Once again, its raya. To be honest, I have fully taken advantage of the holiness of Ramadhan. I tried in the beginning but work and making brownies got the best out of me. At 27, raya has a whole new meaning as compared to when I was 7. As a child, raya meant money, money, money and sometimes food to me. The whole idea of getting up early, slipping into a new (sometimes old) baju kurung, eating rendang and collecting green packets from the elders and playing with my cousins were all so exciting that it made it hard for me to fall asleep the night before.
During college years, my raya celebrations were difficult. I only went back to my parents’ like a day before eid and asking for forgiveness was excruciating as I watched the frustrated looks on my parents faces. At this time, I couldn’t be bothered with the green packets anymore though some of my relatives insisted that I take it anyway. Questions from my nosy relatives began to irritate the poop out of me.
Example 1. Boyfriend mana?takkan tak bawak mai?
Example 2. Gemuknya..makan beras apa ni?
Example 3. Bila nak abis belajar? Nak kerja kat mana nanti? Exam dapat GPA brapa? Anak uncle memang pandai,dia dapat so so and so..(its usually a lie)
Example 4. Bila nak kawin ni? Umur dah brapa..takkan nak tunggu beruban..
As years passed by, I began to despise raya more and more. It’s not actually raya that I hate. It’s just that when its raya, people tend to take advantage by visiting your home, asking for forgiveness and only to get on your nerves the very same way right after that. I also started to loathe raya songs. Its either its too happy (happy people irritate me) or its too sad (I have enough sadness in my life, don’t need to be reminded of it).
These days, my eid is slightly more peaceful. I would finish my brownies orders, go shopping at subang parade for baju raya for my mom, dad and brother then fly back to penang to see my parents. I no longer have to go back to Kelantan to see my dad’s side of the family. Only 3-4 or my mom’s siblings would come over to our house and I have my sister to answer their questions on my behalf. hahaha. I would usually fly back to kl on the 3rd day of eid. So yeah, my eid is better though it does not fit other people’s definition of raya.
Happy eid. I sincerely apologize if I have offended anyone in any way. I’m sorry if I forgot to reply any texts or return any calls. I have not gone missing again ( Believe me I’m trying very hard), I’m just occupied with a lot of things. I barely have time to finish watching a movie in one go. I’m sorry if I have cursed too much.
Selamat hari raya. Maaf zahir dan batin.
